The night before I left, we had a mini send-off dinner at our new house. In attendance, besides he and I, were his parents, his mom’s parents and his mom’s twin sister. We were a lot closer with his family than we were mine. One of the reasons being that they all lived so close and mine lived about 25 miles away. The other reason being they were like the family I never had. I mean sure, they had their drama just like everyone else. But the level of acceptance and attention they had for one another was different than mine. We’ll get into that at another time.
We had the grill fired up and the steaks marinating. His mom and her mom were in charge of making the fries because they made THE BEST fries (which I learned from them), and we had all the coors light that 7 people could possibly drink. If you couldn’t tell by now, we were fans of the Silver Bullet. It was the perfect send off. We talked about how they remembered me from working at “The Dog”, and how much I’ve changed since then. Somewhere in-between I’d started dying my hair blonde. Also, I’d made enough money at the car lot to provide myself with new tits. I’d saved up some commission money just 2 months in to working there. So yeah, I was totally different. His dad and grandpa told me that if this is what I wanted to do, I should go for it. They would in no way judge me or turn their noses up. His mom, a tad on the competitive side, decided that she looked pretty good and she’d send some pics in to the magazine, too. She was sure she’d get in.
That morning, going to the airport, I can’t tell you that I was sad to leave my husband behind. I wasn’t even sure if I were going to miss him. It would, however, be the first time we’d ever been away from each other in the 2 1/2 years we’d been together. I wasn’t even sure how he really felt about it. He was so reserved and passive that all of his comments on the matter seemed to be forged.
It’s pretty cool.
Hope you don’t get a ‘stick tooticky’ for someone new
All sorts of short, distant comments like that. They sometimes made me wonder if he even wanted me to pose nude at all. In some ways it seemed like he was cool with it, and in some ways it seemed like he was almost embarrassed. And yes, “sticky tooticky” was a phrase he used very often.
I don’t really remember much after that. Just getting off the plane in Burbank where you exited the plane to go outside instead of a gate. Then you had to walk into the airport. That was pretty neat to me as I’d never seen that before. It was so sunny and nice. Especially for January. I had just come from much colder weather, so I was thrilled.
I would shoot for Easy Rider Magazine first. So it was arranged that the chief editor would pick me up from Burbank airport. When I first saw him, it was like he walked right out of my imagination. I’d pictured a tall, bald, strong looking guy to escort me to the company vehicle. And that’s pretty much exactly what happened. Except he used his own car. A truck, actually.
Our first stop was at the Daily Grill right across from the airport. I guess he took all the “models” there, and I was sure glad because I was starving.
He began asking me questions. Questions I thought were personal, but for some reason didn’t mind answering. He asked what my husband thought. So I told him. He asked what my family thought. So I told him they were weary, and didn’t know many details. He then told me that if it’s a one time thing for me, then great. If I plan to try to do more, then it’s important that I have a strong support system. Then, he asked if I wanted to pursue this as more of a career.
A career? Have I given it that much thought? I just wanted to see how this went, and then maybe I’d think of it.
So I told him pretty much that. And that’s when he said it. Right there in the middle of the Daily Grill while he was shoveling down his french dip.
“You know. Print work will only get you so far. If you want the quick fame and good money, Porn is where it’s at for you. Trust me kid, I’ve been doing this for a long time”
I’m sure I was silent for a good five minutes after that. Then I busted out with:
“Wow. What kind of support system would you need if you were to take it that far?
That’s pretty classic, Ash. Sarcasm to hide your bashfulness.
He told me that it was a choice I’d have to be very sure about making. For obvious reasons. But then, I think he sensed my fresh-off-the-plane-from-oklahoma naivety and he backed off from the porn talk. At least until I’d bring it up again.
The drive to the hotel seemed like forever. We’d be driving all the way from Burbank to Oxnard. Along the way, I asked him about the pricing of some of the houses and kept comparing everything to Oklahoma. I think he was getting annoyed. I started thinking to myself that this guy probably doesn’t care too much about the differences of cost of living from California to Oklahoma. So I thought I’d talk about him for a while.
“So what kind of Bike do you have? Man that works for a motorcycle magazine has to have one or three, right?
He chuckled. He told me that he just had bought a Sportster (which I thought was a bit small for a man of his size) and he rides with a “club” almost every sunday. He said it was the best thing about his life besides his daughter who he only saw 30% of the time. I understood. My father in law was the president of a club that were affiliates to the black and white. I knew all the rules and sanctity of the patch. My husband was in it for a while, but by the grace of god he got out of it before it got too violent. My father in law, however, did not.
We talked a little more about the club he rode with, but wasn’t patched up with, and I told him a little about what I knew. But, as a former ALMOST “Property Of”, I knew that I had to keep my mouth shut at all costs. Big or small.
When we got to the hotel it was pretty standard procedure. He checked me in and walked me up. In the room, I called my husband and talked to him for hours. I told him all about the lunch conversation and the conversation about who he rode with. I wish I could give out more info. But I’m saving all the juicy stuff for the book.
That next morning, it was go time. He picked me up around 8am and took me to get breakfast. Then he took me to the shop where the photo shoot would take place.
There’s no turnin’ back now!
Everything was all set up with lights and a giant white screen/backdrop to park the bike and take the pictures on/in front of. Reality set in, and suddenly I felt more at ease. The make up artist kept commenting me on my eyelashes and complexion. That made me feel really good. I asked her all about herself, too. I like hearing people’s stories. I think that helped put me at ease, too.
After I was all done up, we would start fully clothed. I met the creator of the custom bike I’d be posing with. He was incredibly nice, and covered in ink. He brought his new puppy dog with him. I absolutely loved that little dog. It was a black and white boston terrier. It was so new to him, that he hadn’t named it yet. I posed with him and the dog a few times, too. That was very grounding for me. It made the experience feel more real, if that makes sense. To know that there was normalcy, besides just the act of getting naked. Which trust me, got really comfortable very quick. I think that the fact that it was a professional setting with a professional crew made me a bit more comfortable than doing it in my house. You’d think it’d be the opposite. But to me, it seemed a little bit more legit.
As I said, we started fully clothed and I’d work them off slowly. Well, just my top. It wasn’t a fully nude shoot. I posed on top, in front, behind. The crew and myself made jokes and laughed the whole time and it was a pretty pleasant experience. I was so comfortable in my own skin that I surprised myself. Aside from needing to work out a little, I wasn’t ashamed at all of being nude. In fact, I found it very liberating and freeing. Plus I loved motorcycles. So I was altogether happy about the day. I couldn’t wait to call home and tell him everything. I wasn’t sure what kind of feedback I’d get. But he was the only person I had to tell. And he was going to get an earful!
After it was over, we ate a late lunch. They ordered a giant sub and we enjoyed it in the office of the shop. He’d then take me to the hotel to rest and clean up before taking me to a dinner on the pier. To this day, I can’t remember what pier it was. I was so unfamiliar with the area back then. Dinner was good, and we talked more about his daughter and a little bit more about where he came from. As I said, I like to know people’s story. I felt I had to bring up the porn subject again. It wasn’t something I could just let go.
“Say, for instance, if one wanted to explore their options, where would they start?”
I had to ask. I had no serious or pressuring desire to do porn at the time. But just as any young, new to the game, girl would be, I was super curious.
He told me that I’d need to do my research and find an agent. Then the agent would give me all the details, if they were interested in working with me.
I had a lot to think about that night. My first photo shoot, my first trip to LA, my first porn talk. There were a lot of firsts. And the next morning would be my first completely nude shoot. My mind was racing, to say the least.